A seat at the table for everyone
- Opinion
- 2 days ago
- 2 min read
By Sheila Ramalingam
Malaysia is proudly multi-racial, multi-cultural, and multi-religious. We speak often of unity in diversity, of mutual respect and harmony. But sometimes, in the smallest of details, our actions reveal how much further we still have to go.
There are some functions that I have attended over the years, where only one type of meat was served: beef. Now, for many people, that may seem like a fine and even generous choice. But for most Hindus, consuming beef is not an option. It’s not a matter of preference; it is a matter of faith.
When beef is the only protein available, I am left with two unappetising choices: either become a vegetarian for the day, or quietly skip the meal altogether. And while I can survive missing a meal, what I lose out on is more than just food. I lose the opportunity to share in a communal moment with others, to sit down at the same table, and to be part of the same gathering in a full and equal way.
This is not about being picky. It’s not about demanding special treatment or expecting a tailored meal. It’s about consideration. About the basic courtesy of acknowledging that in a room full of Malaysians, there are likely to be different dietary needs arising from religious or cultural beliefs. It is about inclusion, and more deeply, it is about respect.
When an event serves only beef, it tells me – without saying a word – that my beliefs were not remembered, not considered, and perhaps not even deemed important. And that hurts.
In Malaysia, we are often quick to say “we must be sensitive” to each other’s customs. But sensitivity is more than a slogan. It’s an action. It’s looking at your guest list and thinking, “Might someone here not eat beef, or pork, or meat altogether?” It’s choosing to provide at least one alternative, not because you’re forced to, but because it is the right and respectful thing to do.
Some may say, “It’s just food. Why make a big deal?” But food is never just food. Sharing a meal is a universal act of togetherness. When I’m unable to join you at the table because my beliefs weren’t accounted for, the message I receive is clear: I’m present, but not fully welcome.
So here’s my request: if you are organising an event, please think of all your guests. If you can’t accommodate basic dietary restrictions that stem from deeply held beliefs, then perhaps reconsider the guest list. Because respect works both ways; and I’d rather not be invited than be invited and then made to feel like an outsider.
This is not about a free meal. It is about dignity. About the simple human right to be seen, heard, and respected for who I am.
In our diversity lies our greatest strength. Let’s not let it go to waste, one meal at a time.
The author is the Deputy Executive Director at Universiti Malaya Centre of Leadership and Professional Development (UM LEAD), and Senior Lecturer at the Faculty of Law, Universiti Malaya.
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